Monday, March 25, 2013

Allow Me to Re-Introduce Myself

My name is M - S
P to the il-lowz!  
CEO of the BDHq, Ohhh!  lol

I'm Baaack!  I love that Jay-Z song, by the way.  :-)

Let me first start off by saying that my cup runneth over with love, joy, and utter gratitude for your words of encouragement and support.  I receive it and honor your presence here.  Thank you all so very much.  

Since I'm back, what better way to get started than to get reacquainted and let you all know which way the wind is really blowing around here.  ;-)

Last time we left off, I told you where I've been and what I've been up to.  In this post, I want you to know what to expect here at BDHq.

Some things haven't changed
I am still a big girl on a journey of growth.  My hair is still natural.  I still like the same things: reading, writing, traveling, and hanging out with friends.  I still work at the same job where I travel quite a bit, although I won't be traveling as much this year.  

I'm still learning this blogging thing.  New plugins, tips and tricks, and new social networks are popping up every day and finding my way through what would work best to use.  I'm still working on writing headlines, tweaking my post format, working the full time gig, and managing my crazy schedule.  At the same damn time.  lol  Here are some things that are hopping around in my head that I wanted to share.

Focus Change
I write about personal growth, health, life lessons, experiences, and things that are on my mind that I hope touches you, the reader, in some way.  Originally, I targeted plus sized, full figured, zaftig, BBW, big boned women, because: 

1-  I am one; and 
2-  I think that this society really craps on women of size.  If you aren't a Size 2 or less, then society is coming for your confidence every second of the day.

I wanted to build a blog that spoke to all of us big girls.  I wanted to write posts that motivated us to work on our self esteem, be more confident, and become stronger in mind and healthier in body.  I wanted to show that everyone starts somewhere and that none of you are alone in this journey.

What I've found is that these things aren't exclusive to us.  Women of all sizes are constantly attacked with messages through film, tv, fashion, music, and even people we love, that tell us that we aren't good enough the way that we are.  There is this idea of what the perfect woman looks like, that none of us have yet to achieve, according to them.  We are ALL in this together, really.  

Women of all sizes read this blog.  Hell, men are even reading it.  We all want to feel better and be better for ourselves and for the people that we love: women and men.  This isn't for one group of folks.  You are ALL welcome here.

With that said, I decided to shift my focus a little.  I will continue writing about life and experiences, but I'm now writing with the intention of reaching and everyone who needs to read what I've written.  

Did You Notice the New Curtains?
I recognize that people come to a blog for content.  They visit, because there is something that intrigues them, speaks to them, or helps them in some way.  They don't necessarily visit because they like the look of a blog.  However, if the blog looks nice, is easy to use, is not cluttered or confusing, they will stay longer and they'll also return.  

I won't deny that my last blog design got the job done, but it felt heavy.  It didn't have the look of a blog about personal development and growth.  Also, the empty ad space on the side didn't give my blog good energy.  The feng shui was off, if you will.  :p   I shed that design and went for something lighter, warm, inviting, and clean.  

This site is still a work in progress.  The overall design and theme will stay the same, but some things will change around here like buttons or plugins.  I hope that the changes are useful and not too distracting.  If any of the changes are causing problems, please let me know.

When I first started blogging, I read countless articles on monetization: How to Monetize Your Blog, When is the Best Time to Monetize Your Blog, How to Get the Most Money From Monetization, and so on.  I had this vision of how I was going to add Google Adsense and all sorts of little knick knacks that flash and blink in hopes that you guys would click and I would get paid.  It never happened.  The most that I did was include a few Amazon affiliate links to relevant posts.

When I decided to come back, I thought long and hard about monetization.  I came to the conclusion that even though money is not my focus here, I'll still monetize the blog.  Even though Blogger is free, I am still paying for some things, so any monies that I receive will offset some of my expenses and allow me to expand my vision.  Regardless of how I choose to monetize, I will include disclaimers, be honest in my thoughts and recommendations, and I'll try to keep things as clean and simple as possible.  

From My Last Blog 
I recently heard a quote that went something like, if you shine a light on the things that you fear the most, you take away its power.  It can no longer hurt you if it is out there.  From my last blog, I pulled back the curtain.  I was absolutely terrified by the reaction that it would receive.  However, once I pushed that Publish button, I exhaled.  It's all out there and it can never be taken back.  

I've been pretty honest since the beginning, but it has still been tailored not to expose too much.  The last post went beyond that.  It was raw and it was truly personal.  

Through sharing what happened, I experienced another form of closure.  I have no fear about what others think about it.  I shined a light on it all and now, I've let it go completely.  Yup, it happened.  I'm grateful for the experience and now I'm on to what the future holds.  

That is what I want for this blog to be.  I want it to be about being fully present and healing in the process.  I'm not holding back any more.  As I said in the last post, this isn't about me really.  It is about supporting each other through this great journey called life.    

Sure, a lot of what you will see here may carry a more serious tone, but don't get it twisted, I am still me.  I still like to have fun and crack jokes.  I still give shout outs and still listen to my trap music, among other things.  It's just that I'm growing.  I'm learning more about who I am.  I am more me than I have ever been and I'm going to keep evolving as I continue in life.  My posts going forward will reflect that. 

Whatever you read here, regardless of whether you love it, hate it, agree, disagree, or whether you don't get it or it touches you, know that it is written with love and comes from the deepest part of me: my soul.  

I look forward to seeing where this journey takes all of us.  

Please feel free to comment, visit old posts, share it with others, pin it, or contact me.  

Blessings all  


  1. I look forward to where your journey will take you to! Thanks so much for sharing with us!

  2. Absolutely! I've got so much planned for this blog. It's only up from here. :-)

  3. I am back again and looking forward to reading about your journey and your take on it.

  4. Thanks for coming back! Stay tuned!

  5. I'm here for you, Sister. I love you and will be here to support you as you keep those curtains pulled back. That's real talk.

    1. Thank you, BIB! This made me cry. I truly feel this and I love and appreciate you for it.

  6. Whoo Hoo! So glad that you are back and in action. Can't wait to read what you have in store for us.

    1. Hey Amiyrah! Thank you for coming by and checking me out! The work is just pouring out of me. I have a lot to share. :-)

  7. I just got back from a lecture by Weldon Long. He wrote an amazing book called "the upside of fear" Your post reminded me how happy I was to hear the things he had to say, because afterall, we are more powerful in the end than any thing, so let's not give that away ;) xo So happy you're back

    1. Hi Amberbop! Thank you for coming by! I will definitely be checking out Weldon Long. That sounds like a really good book to read. The fact that he is focusing on a positive angle for fear intrigues me. Thanks again for your comment!

  8. I like that you are speaking to all women not just those of us blessed with the extra curves. We all have the same issues with self esteem, confidence, and body image.

    P.S. I love that Jay Z song too. Used to have it on my voice mail back in the day.

    1. Thank you! All of us women are faced with the challenges that you mentioned, so I definitely didn't want to leave anyone out.

      lol I love it! Jay-Z on the voicemail!